Play "Ball"

January 30, 2025

If you have a career batting average over .300 in the MLB you will make millions of dollars and eventually make it to the Hall of Fame.  If you bat .200 you’ll make league minimum (get this, $750,000 a year plus a per diem equal to $35,000…because ya know, one can’t afford to eat on three quarters of a million per year…the audacity!!).  It’s more than most people make in a lifetime; you get to hang out with the rich and famous; and you get your pick of the groupies not scooped up by the Derek Jeters of the world. 

To put things into better perspective, batting .300 means you are failing 70% of the time.  Batting .200 means you fail 80% of the time.  Now, knowing all of this, failing 95% of the time no longer feels that awful! 

In additional news, it seems the MLB players association plans to strike at the end of the current collective bargaining agreement.  Poor bastards can barely afford their 35,000 square foot mansions.  And hey, it isn’t cheap having a mistress in every city they play in!  Have mercy on them for crying out loud!!